Change comes; the fire comes whether we want it to or not. Whether change happens, as an unexpected upheaval such as death as described by William Bridges’, in his book The Way of Transition, or it is a slow gradual process. Either way, the many faces of change are always accompanied by transition. Being in transition is an interesting place to be. It seems to me that when I experience change many of these transformations occur in the upper left and upper right quadrants of the Ken Wilber’s Integral theory. The spirit, mind, body are all in a spiritual dance. I find that it can be difficult to be in transition. Change seems to happen to us, often we have no say, but in the transition, that is where uneasiness can occur. I envision this transition as having one foot in the past and another foot in the future and straddling the present. In this place, if consciousness of the process, the possibilities are endless, if in a state of fear often we limit ourselves to what we already know. This place of transition anything can happen, this is what Bridges calls the “neutral zone.” Bridges tells us,” Transition renews us. It is as though the breakdown of the old reality releases energy that has been trapped in the form of our old lives and converts it back into its original state of pure formless energy”(p.42).
If we were to think of our lives like a field, we might image turning the soil up as farmers do in preparation of the seed. Seed, water and nutrients will naturally go into the deepest crevices of the fallow field, those areas that hold the trauma and most needed of nutrients. It is difficult to perceive, when standing looking at an empty field, that in just a few months it can turn into a rich and vast field of harvestable food. Sometimes the soil gets so tired and depleted of nutrients after many growing seasons. The farmers, with all their wisdom, use a fire to destroy all the old growth to create ash and new life. It is from the perceived destruction that arises new growth. The fires will come whether you want it to or not. While writing this paper, I think of the quote by Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estés, "New seed is faithful. It roots deepest in the places that are most empty.” I take great comfort in this. I have experienced much pain and suffering in my life. I am an ovarian cancer survivor for the last 30 years, recovered alcoholic of ten years, I have survived lost my fiancé the day after he proposed. I know about transitions.
The Buddha tells us that nothing stays the same. Buddhist practice is simple, direct and not an easy solution. It is the direct annihilation or severing of the attitude of the victim to the attitude of responsibility. I hold that Buddhism, reincarnation and karma are primary components to freedom from suffering. Anything that happens to a soul is in direct correlation to action performed in this life or a past life. While I recounted the experiences that have molded my perception into a way of thinking and believing that perpetuates suffering. Spinning, over and over again, like a wheel, I repeat negative events, creating my own torment. This authentication process takes place primarily in the UL and UR quadrants and allows an egocentric view of the world to move out into an ethnocentric view or stage. Reflecting on my own path, cancer patient at age fourteen, chemotherapy, ten years in recovery from alcohol addiction, broken relationships, the death of close friends, family and my fiancé. I began to assimilate these events that have left me with a frozen heart and with an attitude anchored in sadness. I am imprisoned by my own suffering. I can state, “I have faith,” although being in the back seat with someone else driving is very hard for me. Impatience and always-wanting things to go my way leads to my affliction. I am quite accomplished at this task. Conscious of transition, which occurs in the UL, I feel I can move from self-preoccupation, which can aid in turning toward the spirit of altruism. This radiates into all the quadrants throughout the stages of development and consciousness.
We have choice to decipher transitions of a spiritual journey as a bystander, or use the Integral Theory as a road map to navigate through life with vigilant reflection and self-realization. Integral theory allows the practitioner a means for insight or introspection. Emblematic of life, the question asked is, “Do I want to just observe or do I want to be mindful and put a honest effort into changing?” The journey of looking at oneself is tedious and not pleasurable, but a stipulation if transformation is going to transpire. I am the child, asking, “Are we there yet? The ride starts off as a time for introspection, which from a child’s perspective is boring, grueling, and just plain old, not fun. The children perceive suffering and in anticipation of the rewards, the passage seems endless and brutal. However, once crossed over, after going through the transition from fallow field to a great harvest many changes begin to radiate out into all aspects of life, like ripples in still water.